Its as if I’d like to live my day working up to 30-48 hours everytime. I feel like I’d like to do more, but can’t.
I work on a fulltime regular job as an IT consultant. Well, I’m lucky I found a place where they won’t confine you to regular 8-5 or 9-6 jobs. Its more or less a responsibility based trust wherein you come to work and finish the tasks assigned to you. If you can’t do that, then you’re not fit for the job. Otherwise, all is well.
I usually come to the office at around 9:30-10:30 in the morning. When I get to my desk, I hit the ‘localhost’ ASAP. I don’t intend to dilly dally with warming up to some good RSS feeds before hitting the codes. I have a set of sessions I routinely open upon boot. I have my Pidgin, my Skype, my Thunderbird, my Firefox browser, and the ever reliable gnome terminal. My lunch is usually set off to around 1:30 to 3:00pm because of elevator traffic (believe me, this is real.. I only learned about this with this new workplace). I take quick restroom breaks, and nothing more (well, except for ‘brain drain’ times). And then I leave at around 6-6:30pm because, usually either I have to go do some errand or hit the freelancing at home.
I keep a whiteboard upfront my bed. This reminds me of my tasks at the very next second I open my eyes in the morning. I list down all items here, and keep a brief list in my phone too (which serves as my planner now). Its a very hard thing to think about.. spending so much time in work rather than stopping by to smell the flowers. But, in the same way, I’m happier to feel that I will always be ready in the future for anything that might need attention and financial requirements. Thinking about working endlessly is bad and dangerous not only for one’s health but also to one’s immediate loved ones.
Most of the time, I don’t get to go out of the house during weekends, and I end up feeling more exhausted than refreshed every Monday. But even though this is the case, I still try to be the best listener and moral supporter for my family. I do my coding in the sala (well, do not try this if you don’t have a very high level of concentration) while watching DVD with my family while laughing while eating, and while talking to my honey on the phone. Some multi tasking huh? Well, it slows me down a bit, but at least I feel as though I have hit two birds (maybe even more) with one stone.
Some of my friends say that I should try to stop and free myself of these freelance jobs but, my thoughts are.. well, if they came to me as an opportunity that I can take or bargain with, at least I am blessed. And how can one decline a blessing? I’m overloaded with work, true, but I have my honey who regulates my working sessions so that I won’t forget to eat or take a break. I take vitamins regularly, and it does me good. I often advice this to my similarly workaholic friends who are getting sick more often than I do.
I just love to work. Whenever I feel a little tired and pushed up against the wall, I can only manage to tell myself that.. “If I feel pressured, then maybe it was my own fault. I can try to learn to either say ‘no’ or write a better ‘to do list’. And then, next time will always be better“.
Some would say that I may as well be the richest girl alive now because of that.. too many projects plus a fulltime job and it doesn’t satisfy me? Of course that’s not the case! Personally, I’d like to say that if one is responsible and prepared, then there is no need for worry. I don’t lend money, I’m not used to borrowing any too at the same time. But hey, when the need arises, and you need a lot for say inheritance loans, housing loans, etc.. there are lending companies to turn to. But the thing of the matter is, being prepared is what will save the day. You’ll feel spited by the fact that you’re efforts will be spent on things you didn’t plan for, but its always better not to go broke.
I remember once.. there was a seminar by an insurance company, and they popped a question: “What do you do first with your money?” I excitedly raised my hand and said: “First, I think about how much I’ll keep in the bank, then try to haggle which items in my to-buy-list I can drop.“ It was an absurd answer for some, but the best one for my lifestyle.